The Enemy in the Mirror

 The Enemy in the Mirror

Whether or not I like to admit it, there are a few people who enter my life whom I don’t really like. I’ll call them “enemies” for lack of a better word. I might not like them for various reasons. They disagree with me. They seem always to be gaming me, competing with me, want power over me. They grate on my nerves. It’s just uncomfortable to be around them. Well here’s a game-changing thought. Instead of “enemy,” why not call them “teacher?”  

In explanation let me begin with this premise: everyone in my life is here to teach me something, to hold a mirror up to me so that I can see myself more clearly. For example, the one who grates on my nerves may simply be mirroring characteristics in my own personality. Encountering this person, I might say to myself “Oh no, here he comes again. I’ll shut down, try to ignore him, just suffer through his visit.”  That sounds like me being the enemy, not him. Instead I could ask,”What is he here to teach me? What fellow is in the mirror that he is holding up to me?”  Instead of reverting to my old, defensive  tactics, thinking of him as a teacher might prompt me to take a different tack. His “grating on my nerves” could get me to be honest with myself regarding my feelings about my encounters with this individual, and to understand that I will continue to have relationships with people that “grate” until I change my approach to them. Further, my approach might look like being honest with these teachers, not in a defensive way, but in a compassionate one. They are, as far as I know, just being themselves. The more I am truly myself to those I encounter, the brighter the image in the mirror, the more that image becomes a friend.